THE VALET

a film review by Malik Isasis






















Every Memorial Day holiday since September 11, 2001 has been a marathon of violent pornography, self indulgent heroism and self congratulatory propaganda about the military. It’s not at all inspiring—it evokes no reflection about peace, rather the media and the government perpetuates the warrior mythology in order to hide its agenda of death and destruction in plain sight.

To escape the National circle jerk, I decided to avoid the news entirely—almost, entirely. Sometimes it’s like watching someone who can take his/her feet and put them completely behind his/her head—wouldn’t you stare? You know you would.

The Valet

The Valet is a French farce about love, betrayal and obsession. Is there any other kind? Billionaire Corporatist Pierre Levasseur (Daniel Auteuil) is photographed while having a rendezvous with his Supermodel paramour Elena Simonsen (Alice Taglioni). After two years of living in the shadow, Elena wants Pierre to divorce his wife. Predictably, he says he needs more time; she states that he has no more time. A tabloid photog, photographs the two lovers, just as the hapless valet Francois Pignon (Gad Elmaleh), passes by.

Pierre’s wife played by Kristen Scott Thomas (who knew that she spoke French) sees the magazine and confronts him. Pierre quickly states that it’s not his girlfriend, rather it was the guy standing next to them, girlfriend. The wife doesn’t take the bait, and secretly hires a private investigator.

Simultaneously, Pierre sends his crack team of lawyers and investigators to find the guy in the picture.

Francios is in love with his childhood friend Emilie (Virginie Ledoyen) and has been building up the courage to ask her to marry him. While having their customary lunch Francois pulls out a ring and Emilie recoils like a snake ready to strike.

“You’re like a brother to me.” She says.

The pain that registered across Pierre’s face is palpable…humiliating. I may have over identified with this moment.

“I don’t want to get married. And not to you.” She finishes.

Emilie states that she doesn’t have time for romance. Her bookshop is in debt and she needs 32, 500 Euros to keep her business afloat. He offers to help her pay for it. She smiles at him sympathetically.

Francois leaves the lunch deflated and walks past Pierre and Elena just as their photograph is being taken.

The Deal

Pierre’s lawyer finds Francois at the swanky Les Jardins De Chaillot. The lawyer asks Francois what would he charge if he were to pretend to be dating a supermodel and have her stay at his place.

“32,500 Euros,” Francois stated.

Elena moves in with Francois and they get to know one another…blah-blah-blah

This plot could be seen coming a mile away, but it was handled delicately, with respect to the material. All the characters in the film were all well developed and made the absurdity believable. Hollywood would have fumbled this movie, because Hollywood doesn’t respect adulthood as much as the European film industry does. This is why we get films like “Knocked Up” with adults forever arrested in adolescence.

The most powerful theme in this film is control. The billionaire corporatist and his wife’s relationship had died long ago, but they held on because they could. Both were afraid to part ways but used their power and influenced as weapons.

Everyone within their vortex got sucked into their power struggle with one another. However, Elena and Francois were both able to hang onto their humanity and stay grounded to their ideals and come out the other side with dignity.

The movie is still with me. When this happens, it is well worth recommending.


Grade: B+

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